So, as you all know, we are facing a financial dilemma. Stefan’s unemployment runs out at the end of this month and we don’t know what we’re going to do after that. The job market in Richmond is pitiful, as is the real estate market. All I know for sure is that we are in good company.

Despite all that, we are not at each others’ throats. If anything, it has pulled us closer together. The ongoing drudgery of job hunting, paying bills, cutting out things we thought we needed has actually helped both of us better realize who we are as people and who we are as a couple.

Our life probably looks very boring. For now, in these times especially, we find comfort in our routines. I suppose it’s because a schedule is one of the very few things we can control. We cannot control the economy, we cannot control who is hiring, and we cannot control the real estate market. But what we can control is ourselves. Our circumstances have forced us to look inside ourselves and find the beauty and creativity that lies within – to hear that still, small voice that so often gets drowned in all the chatter and clatter around us.

I see people looking for happiness everywhere. Somewhere along the way, I bought into the hype, too. The next big new thing was going to make me happy. Wanting something and then getting it gave me a thrill. And now, over the course of the year and these circumstances, I am seeing more and more the error of my ways. I am craving the simple life. I am living the simple life now, for the most part, and still I see more ways to simplify it.

It’s an interesting contrast. Earlier this year, we cut back our cell phone plan. Originally, we had a data plan where we could surf the ‘Net on our phones and check our personal email and respond back. Once the income went down, we cut that back. We weren’t really using it as much as we’d thought we would, anyway. Now we are finding we rarely use our cell phones at all. We’re actually thinking about getting rid of them altogether and just getting cheapo phones with a calling card. Having one around should the car break down or some other catastrophe pop up seems prudent. At the same time, I am toiling away at work, where they are creating even more features for cell phones. The company sees dollar signs in the new features we are creating; meanwhile I merely see more complicated money traps.

Something else we discovered last weekend at the grocery store. This one still bugs me and shows me how much I still need to learn. Last weekend was the first of the month. We went to Food Lion and were just bowled over at all the amazing sale items. We stocked up pretty well on that trip. There were a lot of Buy 1 Get 1 Free signs. Holy cow, it was overwhelming! We were going down the soda isle, and saw some Buy 1 Get 1 Free signs and the Coca-Cola guy was there, either re-stocking or doing inventory or something of the sort. Stefan and him got to talking about the sales, and the guy said, “You know, it’s amazing how much more we sell with the Buy 1 Get 1 Free sales versus the Buy 4 for $10. It’s all the same price. The only difference is how it’s worded.”

I took a glance at our overflowing cart and felt….suckered. I knew that if there was a sign that said “50% Off” we would have half as much stuff in our cart, and I realized what the guy was saying was so true. There is so much freaking psychology behind the price tags we see in the stores, just to get us to spend more money there. I felt a bit sick. It is so hard, though, to NOT pick up the second bag of chips or whatever has the Buy 1 Get 1 Free sign next to it. Turns out, it’s really just 50% off, and if you just pick up one, you’ll spend half as much money.

Smack me upside the head and call me Sally!

Psychology lesson aside, I’m still learning about the games in the grocery store. I’ve actually recently signed up for a service called The Grocery Game and if I follow the list of rock-bottom sale items and combine them with the coupons as instructed, I can knock down the grocery bill by $60 or $70 or even more. For a little penny-pinching person like me, this is like the world no longer spinning.

We are both finding a new joy in the simplicity of life. And it hit me this morning that because of what we are going through, we are seeing the true cost of things. In this area, it is nothing at all to drop $80 or more on a haircut. I was just thinking about how expensive that is. If I want to get my hair done, I will actually have to plan and save up for it. I haven’t done that since I was a teenager. And Stefan has come up with new strategies too. For example, in WoW, he has a rule that if he wants to buy something for his character, he has to save up twice the gold for it. Only then can he buy it (minus super deals that are once-in-a-lifetime). We’ve seriously begun considering implementing this plan in our real life. No more plastic. No more “oh, we have enough in savings to buy ABC.” Nope, now it will be “Do we have twice the cost of ABC saved up? No? Ok, then we can’t buy it yet.”

Why am I so freaking excited about this plan? Is it the exercise in self-control? Is that really what we have been lacking in this land of milk and honey? Something as simple as good ole fashioned self-control and personal responsibility? There is something that feels so good and right about this new plan of ours, and these new thoughts of ours. It’s like we had to go through this to find ourselves again and I am excited by what we are discovering about ourselves and each other. That’s priceless.